Lost

About five months ago, my closest friend, Mr. R, had give the contact number of his friend, you can call her Mrs.D. He tries to meet me up with Mrs.D, but something from the deep of my minds tells that I wouldn't make it right, but I still try it. I try to make conversation with her via blackberry messenger, but I feel kinda hard make that conversation getting longer. I always reply it with short sentences, short statement, or sometimes I gave her a random question that's not relate on the topic. That seems look cruel for her right? But this is me, I can give my 150% concentration on the person that I love or care, but i can't give more than 60% concentration on the person that I never met or the usual friend of mine. Just in case, I've never met Mrs.D until now....

I feel I'm lost in my own minds..